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Tina, here.

It's the season for a fresh round of weddings, parties and events galore. Which strikes fear and worry into the hearts of even the most prepared of us. So I'm taking you shopping for cocktail dresses and gowns, and showing you what to look for, how to recycle what you have and what never to buy!

I've created a handful of helpful resources to guide you through this often harrowing process, one you can't afford to mess up with costly mistakes or ill-fitting dresses that show up in family pictures for decades to come. We've created a special video,* taking you dress shopping with me in one of Nashville's prettiest boutiques.

*Insiders already received early access to an enhanced version of this post, and have been shopping our list of favorite dresses and gowns. Become an Insider today to receive early access to all our guides and shopping lists!

You're the Mother of the Bride or Groom. Or a guest at a fancy wedding. Or going to a ball or gala. Or even just a really fun cocktail party or celebration. And if you think you're not headed to any of these fun gatherings anytime soon, I implore you to go ahead and prepare your wardrobe for this event because you will need a dress one day. And you can't afford to mess this up by buying an ugly dress on sale or wearing an old dress in your closet.

Where do you even start? There are three ways to shop for a special occasion gown. Custom, semi-custom, and off-the-rack.

Shopping For Special Occasion Gowns and Dresses

1. Custom - probably the most expensive option. Trunk shows in special boutiques are the best source for going custom. A gown or dress is made to your measurements. You get to choose the fabric and can make changes to the design, often with the designer there to help you.

2. Semi-custom - a hybrid of custom and off-the-rack, without much freedom to alter the original design. You can buy an off-the-rack or a made-to-order gown or dress, and alter the design slightly once it comes in by changing the sleeve length or shape, or the hem. It will be ordered in a size closest to your measurements, and then altered to fit once it come in.

3. Off-the-rack - don't assume you won't need to alter an off-the-rack dress or gown. Sometimes the most economic way to buy a dress or gown is to go with an off-the-rack design and then have it altered to fit your shape. The better the fit, the more custom it will look.

You can also rent a gown or buy one second-hand. Insiders, we gave you a complete guide to buying luxury goods second-hand, on the high end resale market. You can also read more about buying high-end consignment on our blog.

This Donald Deal gown from Gus Mayer is like being inside a macaroon. It's for a very special occasion, with a price tag to match (over $6,000). I didn't want to take it off - I kept asking my photographer to take pictures of me until she finally convinced me to move on.

 

 

 

This Monique Lhuillier gown from Gus Mayer makes me feel like a ballerina. You could wear this to a gala, and then easily have it shortened for a summer cocktail party.

This Zac Posen stretch-knit gown is brilliant - you could pack it and travel with it to an event out of town, and you could wear it year-round. It's not so memorable that you couldn't keep wearing it to event after event. You know, all those black tie events you keep going to. But seriously, this could be a great option if you go to a lot of events. Gus Mayer has it for $2590. Similar here.

Other considerations:

If you are hard to fit or two different sizes on top and bottom, go with a two-piece ensemble you can order in two different sizes.

Keep at least either the skirt or the top very classic and neutral so that you can switch up the companion piece. You can see we've paired the Carolina Herrera ballgown skirt with a Zac Posen bustier and a neutral silk blouse. I love a warm sunset tone with black (unlike with stark primary colors).

What do you wear over your gown when it's cold?

An opera coat. Duh.

Ha jk who has one of these? I mean, I want one, but I don't expect anyone else to.

But they are so fun to twirl in! This one is Zac Posen and I found it at Nashville's Gus Mayer (I believe it's been bought.) And if you don't have one of these stunning opera coats, a black blazer fills in quite nicely. Insiders, be sure to watch our video on wearing black blazers, too!

What about dress codes?

The main point is this: dress to respect. It's not about dressing to impress. It's about respecting your hosts and the importance of the event. If your host requests black tie, wear a long gown. If you're celebrating your parents' 50th wedding anniversary, don't wear jeans. Respect and honor the occasion, and the people you love.

On the blog, I've got help for summer wedding dress codes!

If you'd like our help shopping for your special occasion event, we'd love to shop with you or for you! We've even been shopping for our out-of-town readers and Insiders. Email us to find out how we can help you!

Best,

Tina